What Is It??
Anal sex usually refers to penis in anus intercourse but a toy or finger can also be used. Since it’s not associated with reproduction (aka you can’t get pregnant) it’s often never talked about in your typical sex ed class. But a lot of us are doing it! According to the CDC, 35.9% of heterosexual women and 42.3% of heterosexual men have had anal sex. And yes, that is correct dudes, straight men are more likely to try anal than straight women. (To note: this study did not include genders considered “other” or gender neutral.)
But no matter your gender, anyone and everyone can enjoy anal sex!
Is It Worth All The Hype?
Sure can be! The anus itself has a ton of nerve endings that when stimulated the right way can bring a lot of pleasure! (everyone is different of course). If you are a penis owner, then you have something called a prostate gland. Commonly referred to as the “P-spot. This is located under the bladder, right in front of the rectum. Its main function is to produce and release a fluid that helps nourish sperm. This gland is also very sensitive and when rubbed the right way can be extremely pleasurable! The P-spot can be accessed by sticking your finger just a few inches inside the anus and gently pressing up toward the testicles.(picture??) Stimulating the prostate gland not only feels incredible (or so I am told) but it is actually recommended by some doctors as it may lower risk of prostate cancer and help in treating other prostate issues.
Now don’t worry my fellow vulva owners, because anal can still be fun for us too! And yes, it IS possible to orgasm from anal. Because the anus/anal canal is so close to the vagina, you can still hit all those sweet spots you would during vaginal intercourse. You just may need to experiment a little with different positions. Also, most anal positions allow for easy access to the clitoris, so don’t be afraid to show that a little lovin’ with hands or a vibrator.
Where To Start?
My first advice, START SLOW. Like reallyy slowww. Rushing things can cause a lot of pain, and likely an overall bad time. Second, USE LUBE. The anus is not self lubricating and the tissue is very delicate, so don’t be shy with the lube. (Also, PLEASE use actual lube and not the nearest lotion bottle or spit. I promise you, these things will not work well). Not using any or enough lube will very likely lead to anal tearing and bleeding.
But Why Does It Feel Like I Have To Poop?
Okay, yes, anal will often create the same feeling of having a bowl movement. That’s totally normal, especially in the beginning. If you are concerned about having an “accident”, go to the bathroom and empty your bowels beforehand (if possible). If you are planning on having anal often, I suggest getting a reusable enema. This prep can take a bit of extra time but definitely helps with cleaning up after and help you worry less.
However, just remember, the main function of the anus is to extract fecal matter. So poop might happen. But we all poop! So don’t let fear of embarrassment deter you. Starting out on your own can be a great place to start if you're nervous to do it with a partner. There’s a whole world of anal specific sex toys out there! Grab yourself a butt plug or some anal beads and go to town! Just make sure whatever you are using has a handle or a base.
Last But Not Least- Use Protection!
As mentioned earlier, you don’t have to worry about pregnancy with anal sex. But STI’s are still able to be passed during anal sex. In fact, many STI’s, like HIV, are more easily transmittable during anal sex than vaginal. This is due to the fact that the lining of the anus is so thin and can be very easily torn, even if you use lube. So if you are trying anal with a new or casual partner, USE A CONDOM!!
Hope you enjoyed and thanks for read :)
Don't forget, you can always email deepersexuality@gmail.com with any questions for suggestion!